MoPod Show 2.0 - Gay Comedy Podcast

I remembered a word used on a game show and decided I would check it out on Google because my Microsoft spell checker was unable to get its tits around the word ‘pabble’ properly. The word IS ‘pabble’, it’s a real word and I remembered it. At least that’s what I believed until several of the worlds most frequently used spell checkers started fucking with my brain and telling me they had never heard of it.

Of all the dictionaries, of all the languages in the world that I frequently rely on, are the dictionaries supplied by Google and Microsoft.  I bet you do too, huh? You get stuck for how to spell a word and you type in to MS Word and “Hey Presto!” MS Word just pumps out your correctly spelled word after you spell check it.

Well not always.  Was I frustrated when even Google couldn’t find the word ‘pabble’?  Yes I was. If Microsoft fails you think, well that’s par for the course. When Google fails, you think OK, there is no commercial reason to put a page ranking on the word ‘pabble’, so it is not going to show up. What do you do when Google fails? When all else fails, go to Wikipedia!

Wiki is like an internet commando on a search and rescue mission! If your information has been hijacked and kept captive some where, Wiki sharpens its bayonet, scouts the territory out and skewers it for you! Wiki is to words what a big game hunter is frightened starving carnivorous tigers, or so I thought.

The trouble was even Wikipedia had no reference to ‘pabble’.

What was I going to do? My dear word pabble needed rescuing; I was the man that was going to do it!

Stephen Fry, being the self acclaimed, publicly proclaimed queer beacon of intellectuality and hilarity immediately came to mind. The very brainy and very gay Stephen Fry hosts a fun reverse brainy game show called ‘Qi’ on the BBC. Qi stands for Quite Interesting and the web site is www.qi.com.  I posed the question on a forum on Qi, and eventually some one on there had access to the Oxford English Dictionary online (usually costs about 10 dollars per month to use) and they found a reliable reference for me to use in Wikipedia!

I promptly marched right back to www.Wikipedia.org, joined the site as a registered contributor and put pabble in to the pages of web history at last!

Well, not quite.

They said that pabble was not “quite interesting” enough to keep in the encyclopaedia BUT (Hurrah!) they said it would be given a nice home at the next door neighbour’s house, otherwise known as Wiktionary!

Pabble actually means the noise that boiling liquids make, say like porridge bubbling on the stove!

Listen to Stephen Fry’s podgram’s on iTunes under comedy. If you can download Qi from on the BBC iPlayer, its worth it because it’s great. Mr Fry may be nerdy and funny but not as nerdy as Skip and Drew on www.gayscifinerds.co.uk.  Skip and Drew Love the Mopodshow, we stay moist between episodes!

Exactly – what’s the fucking difference?  Well if you’re an American or you’re English, there is a LOT of difference between Brown and White.

I don’t meant the kind of difference where if a white guy puts his pecker in a stream he can tell you what the temperature is, but if his brown skinned buddy put’s his pecker in the same stream he can tell you how deep it is!  Nope, no-sir-ee. I ain’t talking about dippin’ peckers in streams or no place else, no ways.

‘Brown or White bread?’ I hear you all ask. The truth is, Skip recently bought a bread maker and made some seeded Brown bread and some fluffy moist White bread. If I had been asked to choose between the taste of a gorgeous Brown loaf, with pumping kin seeds, and a hot moist White loaf, both gently spread with salted Devonshire double cream butter, even after I had placed either type of bread in my mouth and chewed – I couldn’t genuinely say I preferred Brown over White. Nope, no-sir-ee. I ain’t making no preference between placing Brown or White baguettes in my mouth, or stuffin’ them baguettes in any-other-hole for that matter.

Mind you if you have ever dug a hole in the end of a moist home made loaf of bread and stuck your pecker in for a quick loaf fuck, (ala American Pie), I’d know exactly why! Personally, if I were to tear a hole in the bottom of a moist loaf, I’d prefer the pumping kin seed version - assuming the mixing blade had been removed! You can leave the mixing blade in if you prefer it that way!

Oh Dear, I digress into moist loaf sex.

I’ll ask you again, Brown or White, what is the fucking difference if you’re an American or English?

I’ll tell you – imagine with us as we go back in time. It is May 4th 1979 and Gloria Gaynor is the brown Diva of the disco Charts in America, while in the UK the white queen of politics, Margaret Thatcher aka the Iron Lady, is made Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.

Now travel with me nearly 30 years forward and into the present day. The white Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, that’s Mr Brown, is about to lose his keys to the Big House at number 10 Downing Street.

Meanwhile in the US of Gay, a brown man is most likely to get the keys to the Big White House.  That’s so, so fucking cool! If it was a Tarantino movie we could call the Democrat leader Mr Beige! (But if your not following all this let’s call him Obama and he is basically a very Light Brown).

Now look at this rationally - Hillary Clinton is no Iron Lady. She is a white Lady, but she has had too many imaginary incidents on airport runways in Bosnia for people to trust her. So there will not be a white Lady in the Big White House any time soon. Any way, that white Lady already gave the keys back on the Big White House so a Pig could get in there.

My point is, I am English and I’d still prefer to pop my pecker between Mr Obabma’s American Brown Buns because there is no way I am puttin’ my pecker any where near Mr Brown’s stinky English White Buns. Yeuchh!

As for you Lezza’s, I am sorry about the lack of Muff’in on the Hill. Next time girls!

I hope your enjoying the podcasts here in the MoPodshow, we are! If you fancy a hearing some more madness and mayhem from Skip and Drew, do visit us at http://gayscifinerds.co.uk.

EDITORS NOTE: This is the first in what we hope will be a series of guest blogs from some of our favorite bloggers and podcast friends. This one comes from the Gay Sci Fi Nerds from the UK. Enjoy.

Trying to think of a good strap line to get your attention didn’t take us long for our first Gay Sci-Fi Nerds post for the Mopod Show. Drew likes the sound of “Pimple Tits and the Big Bad Puff” where as Skip was more into “Teen bitches who try to get their bim-boys into trouble at movie theatres”. So “what do you mean?” we hear all you asking.

We don’t need to spell it out for you as we think you have probably encountered this before your self. I don’t know if this is a global phenomenon but I suspect that even gays in the USA will have had this type of encounter in the dark, in a cinema, watching movies. No, not a BJ in the Cineplex toilettes! No, not a sneaky hand job with your cock poking through a hole in the base of a jumbo popcorn bucket!

Actually have you ever tried poking your cock through a hole in the bottom of a popcorn bucket? By preference, we’d recommend you do it with a full sized family bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken, while it is still hot. Remember to remove the plastic cutlery first, unless you like it that way. Amazing how handy those moisture wipes can be!

Sorry, small digression in grease, holes and food fantasies, back to the main post.

Imagine the scene with us. You and your ‘Boyfriend-du-Jour’ or ‘Rug-Munch-al-la-Moment’ if you’re a lezza – have happily sat down in your perfect seat. You’re about to watch a brilliant movie that you have been looking forward to seeing for ages. Every thing is cool, you’re comfortable, the lights have gone down, the trailers have finished and the movie starts. You are totally into the movie, things are exciting and, then your seat is moved from behind. It starts ever so slightly, but rapidly gaining boldness with foot pressure - the seat is being fucked about with and it blows the whole enjoyment process to pieces.

Have you ever noticed it is the same silly blond haired teen ho bitch each time? Not literally the same silly bitch* but the kinda bitch that fits the exact same description. Call ‘em “Pimple Tits” for short

The type of bleach blond silly little girl that only got rid of her training bra by stuffing dried up fried breakfast eggs sunny side up, in to her wonder-bra. Yes she is cute as a button. Yes she has a cute boy friend with her, who incidently is like a little pixy. Fact is the boyfriend is always very, very fuckable, but there he is, sat with ‘Pimple Tits’. What ‘Pixy Boy’ (as they shall be hence known as) is unaware of is that ‘Pimple Tits’ is psychotic. ‘Pimple Tits’ wants to start the argument but wants her ‘Pixy Boy’ to finish the (what she’s hoping) fight for her!

Being gay releases you from all the fake gender respect. Just because ‘Pimple Tits’ is cute, won’t stop this ‘Big Bad Puff’ from turning around and telling her to get her “fucking feet off my chair Pimple Tits!”

* The only exception to this rule occurred over the course of a year’s cinematic viewing at the UCI Cinema in Lea Valley, where a particular ‘really-really-psychotic-Pimple Tits’ had to spout inane nonsense throughout the entirety of three movies. All through the movies she either repeated everything the actors said or tried to guess the out come of the scene, while talking at volume so every one in the cinema could hear her. Given that this ‘really-really-psychotic-Pimple Tits’ had an impressively large, strong, Black boyfriend, we of course, sat there without fuss (after all we are Gay Sci-Fi Nerds and we don’t carry guns or knives). The third time ever so loud ‘really-really-psychotic-Pimple Tits” started up, we had our own secret weapon - another girl! In fact we had the company of a younger female sibling, who had no hesitation in telling the bitch to “shut the fuck up!”

She did. After that, we never saw or heard them ever again. The moral of the story is, don’t be afraid to take your younger sister with you when there is a man’s job to be done! Have you had endure a ‘Pimple Tits’ trying to get her cute ‘Pixy Boy’ boyfriend into trouble by kicking or talking behind you? Share your stories with us the Mopod Show. You can always catch Skip and Drew babbling inanely on their own podcast at http://gayscifinerds.co.uk